


Photograph

by GreenGlitchBitch



Series: Stucky oneshots [2]
Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Bucky Barnes Remembers, M/M, One Shot, Post-Captain America: The Winter Soldier, Reminiscing, Song Lyrics
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-04
Updated: 2019-02-04
Packaged: 2019-10-22 03:57:57
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,729
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17655644
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/GreenGlitchBitch/pseuds/GreenGlitchBitch
Summary: Loving can hurt, loving can hurt sometimes. But it's the only that I know.





	Photograph

**Author's Note:**

> Song fic based on Ed Sheeran's Photograph. I was listening to it, and just had to make a one shot! Steve reminisces, and Bucky remembers. Hope you enjoy!!

_Loving can hurt, loving can hurt sometimes. But it’s the only thing that I know_

Bucky sat alone in his one room apartment in Bucharest, late one night, doing what he always does. Thinking about his past, putting together the bits and pieces that come to him, writing things down in his journals, working to piece together his lost past.

___ When it gets hard, you know it can get hard sometimes, it is the only thing that makes us feel alive _

Across the world, Steve sat on his bed in his room at the Avengers tower in New York. It was one of those times where he had no mission to distract himself from his thoughts. It had been a year since Bucky had saved Steve in the Potomac, and disappeared. Steve searched for weeks on end, but never found him. So he returned home, and kept to himself, alone with his thoughts and memories.

_______ We keep this love in a photograph, we made these memories for ourselves _ _ __ _ _ _

Bucky looked to his many journals, each meaning something. One for friends, one for the war, another for family, things he’s discovered about the world in its present day state, and a final one for loves. He picked up the love journal, opening it to a specific page, one where a picture of Steve as Captain America rested. He remembered the man in the picture, but he remembered him looking different, smaller, skinnier. Not tall, and strong.

___________ Where our eyes are never closing, hearts are never broken, times forever frozen still _

Steve’s mind wandered to the only thing he could think about for a year, Bucky. What did Hydra do to him? Where was the Bucky he remembered? Was he still there, just buried deep down underneath decades of Hydra brainwashing? Where was he? What was happening to him? Did Hydra find him again? How much did he suffer at the hands of Hydra before they finally broke him?

_______________ So you can keep me, inside the pocket of your ripped jeans, holding me closer til our eyes meet. You won’t ever be alone, wait for me to come home _

Bucky reached into the inner pocket he had sewn into his jacket, and pulled out a pile of pictures, copies he’d stolen from the gift shop at the Smithsonian Air and Space Museum a year ago. The museum had been selling them as souvenirs. He hated stealing them, but it removed the risk of someone recognizing him at the register, and after decades of being a trained assassin that was considered a ghost story, he knew exactly how to steal things without getting caught. The first photo was a copy of a photo of Steve before he had been given the super soldier serum. This Steve was someone he recognized more. He could recall more memories with this Steve than the Steve in the journal.

___________________ Loving can heal, loving can mend your soul, and it’s the only thing I know, know _

   Steve thought about everything he’d been through with Bucky. All the time they’d spent together in their small, shared apartment. All the late nights of joking around, and early mornings of Steve waking up to draw the sunrise. All the years they had been friends, protecting each other from bullies, well, Bucky saving Steve from getting his ass kicked to death by a bully.

_I swear it will get easier, remember that with every piece of you, and it’s the only thing we take with us when we die_

Bucky thought about everything he had done in the war, every man he had shot down to stay alive. He thought about everything he’d done while under Hydra control, every person he’d been ordered to kill, and every kill he ever committed. He remembered all of them, and he wished he could take them back.

___________________________ We keep this love in a photograph, we made these memories for ourselves _

Steve got up off the bed and walked over to his dresser. He opened one of the shelves, moved away his clothes, lifted the secret false floor, and grabbed the wooden box residing underneath. He pulled it out of the shelf, placed it on his bed and opened it. He picked up the photo from inside the box gently, and looked at it. It was an original photo of him and Bucky of the day they went too Coney Island, the day Bucky made him ride the Cyclone, and he vomited. They were smiling from ear to ear, Bucky’s arm around Steve’s shoulder. The Smithsonian gave it to Steve when they started the Captain America exhibit. They had found it in their files, and thought he might like it back. He did, and kept it hidden in his memory box, which was filled with things from his childhood, before the serum, before the war. None of the other Avengers knew he had it, and he wanted to keep it that way. Somethings his teammates didn’t need to know.

_______________________________ Where our eyes are never closing, hearts were never broken, times forever frozen still. So you can keep me, inside the pocket of your ripped jeans, holding me closer till our eyes meet, you won’t ever be alone _

Bucky flipped to the next photo, a photo of him and Steve at Coney Island, his arm around Steve’s shoulder. This Bucky wasn’t the one that looked back at him when he looked in the mirror. This was the Bucky he’d seen when he was walking around the Air and Space museum, trying to rediscover his past. This Bucky looked happier, not just because of his smile. His eyes shone with a light Bucky didn’t see when he looked in a mirror. His his hair is far shorter than Bucky’s was now, and he had no facial hair. Bucky could faintly remember that day. He and Steve had saved up money for a day trip to Coney Island. They’d spent all day there, winning prizes at some games, wasting money trying to win others. He could faintly remember Steve throwing up, but he couldn’t remember why.

___________________________________ And if you hurt me, that’s okay baby only words bleed. Inside these pages you just hold me, and I won’t ever let you go _

Steve dug through the box gently, knowing that the contents of the box were not only old, but fragile. He found what he was looking for, a small sized, leather bound book. His hands closed around it, and he pulled it out. It was one of his sketchbooks, a special one, something else the museum gifted back to him. It was the sketchbook Bucky had bought him for his birthday one year. He’d been so happy when he opened the package, he drew his first picture within an hour of getting the sketchbook. Most of the pictures in the sketchbook were of Bucky, while he slept, while he was reading, when he actually posed for Steve. Steve loved drawing Bucky, he had always made it a challenge to try and draw Bucky differently each time.

_______________________________________ Wait for me to come home _

Bucky smiled, still looking at the Coney Island picture.

___________________________________________ Wait for me to come home _

 Steve felt his heart speed up as he looked through the drawings of Bucky.

_______________________________________________ Wait for me to come home _

 Bucky flipped to the last picture, and felt his heart speed up, remembering a feeling he hadn’t felt in a while.

___________________________________________________ Wait for me to come home _

Steve landed on the last page, a drawing of Bucky in his uniform that he’d drawn the day before Bucky shipped out. He smiled wide, remembering how irritated Buck had gotten, sitting for 30 minutes in his uniform. He put the book down, and reached back into the box, feeling a metal chain. Knowing what it was instantly, he pulled it out. It was a golden chain, with a metal oval at the end.

_______________________________________________________ You can fit me inside the necklace you got when you were sixteen. Next to your heartbeat where I should be, keep it deep within soul _

Bucky looked at the picture of Steve in his suit. It had been a special christmas, they had both saved up money to have a photo taken for christmas, as a way to remember the first christmas together in Bucky’s house. Bucky had had one taken of himself too. They had framed them in separate frames, but they had been placed together on the table.

___________________________________________________________ And if you hurt me, that’s okay baby, only words bleed _

Steve opened the locket, and was greeted with an incredibly small photo of Bucky, in a nice suit. Steve remembered that day, they had saved up money for christmas photos, to commemorate their first christmas living together. They had framed them separately, but placed them next to each other on the gas stove, but Steve had a special copy made when he opened up his present from Buckym the locket he now held in his hands.

_______________________________________________________________ Inside these pages you just hold me, and I won’t ever let you go _

Bucky smiled at the photos one last time, and placed them back in the secret pocket of his jacket. He picked up the love journal, and opened it to a new page, writing down the new memories with Steve he had remembered. He wrote down in detail, the Coney Island trip as best as he could remember, and the christmas picture, smiling fondly to himself as he wrote.

___________________________________________________________________ When I’m away, I will remember how you kissed me, under the lamppost back on sixth street. Hearing you whisper through the phone _

Steve thought back to that christmas eve. He and Bucky had gone out for food at a dinner on sixth street, a little christmas dinner between the two of them. When they had left, they stood at the corner of sixth street and seventh avenue, as snow began falling gently on the streets of Brooklyn. Bucky turned to Steve, they had locked eyes, and Bucky leant down as Steve leaned up, until their lips connected.

_______________________________________________________________________ Wait for me to come home _

Separated by thousands of miles of land and water, between different time zones, both men smiled to themselves, cheeks dusted pink. They gently put away their objects, and returned them to their original location, both thinking of the other, and remembering their love for each other.

**Author's Note:**

> Also, I know I gave two different locations for the Christmas photos. I did it on purpose, to show that Steve and Bucky, despite the serum improving their memory, they still can't remember everything perfectly. And it was a nice difference, it'd probably give them something to argue about later on, or something. I dunno, just thought it was a funny idea! Anyway, hope you enjoyed!  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qgmXPCX4VzU  
> Link to the song on Youtube


End file.
